Tuesday, August 08, 2006

Oh Yeah, and I Have Pleurisy

As if I need to follow-up that title. Heh, that last post was all serious and actually very purposeful. I needed to remind myself of all that to plug on and not act a fool because I feel a little bit down and a little bit antsy about it today.

But yes, back to the pleurisy. No, not scurvy or small pox or shingles. Pleurisy. It just sounds so poor drunken sap living in a 19th century lower east side tenement. Pleurisy. And Lebron had it! Woo.

So, let me tell you the exciting story of my path to Pleurisy diagnosis. A couple of weeks ago I started feeling a mild tightness in my side. It is almost the exact same feeling I get when I get a side stitch only I felt it when I wasn't running. It was fairly constant, but fairly mild and I chalked it up to having performed a cart wheel a week before when I'm old and too brittle to perform such acts of acrobatic awesomeness. Anyway, things were fine, but I started to notice that I couldn't sleep on my right side without my side hurting. No big deal. Then I started to notice I was feeling uncomfortable quite frequently. "Stop being a baby" I told myself. But then Friday night while I was walking to my car after work I was in pretty intense pain. I thought maybe it was just a muscle spasm or something. It simmered down a lot an hour and a couple of margaritas later. Whatever.

The next morning I woke up IN AGONY! Seriously. On a scale of 1-10 it was a 900. Ok, a 7 or 8. But really. It sucked. I called my doctor's office and the nurse said I could go to a walk-in clinic or the emergency room and suggested the emergency room since the clinic wouldn't be able to perform all the tests I would likely need. "I haven't been knifed and it's not like I've fallen and can't get up," I thought, "I'm not going to no emergency room." (And I ended the thought with a "girl" said as if I wasn't raised in a cracker household for effect too, just so you know). I went to the clinic and fat Dr Shah and his Indian accent concluded that he didn't know what the problem was and that I should go to the emergency room. I said thanks, but my limbs are still attached I'll just go home and it will probably feel better after I run. So I went and winced home, put on my running clothes, and headed out the door. I ran 1 mile, thank you very much. I came home and started sobbing my side hurt so bad. Mrp called. The connection was bad. And then I called him back. The call was dropped. Then he called me back. I was stubborn. Then he called me back one more time and before you know it we're sitting in the ER with obese homeless hypochondriacs ironically watching the Iron Man on tv.

Four hours later they called me back and made me get into some sexy backless hospital couture and I took a nice nap while the nurses talked about stupid crap outside my room. Sometime later Dawn woke me up and proceeded to take half my blood and replace it with Saline. Yes, picture me lying in a hospital bed in a green hospital gown bundled in a sheet with an iv drip. I know. Then Shelly came and wheeled me like this down the hall and passed the corpse of Mr. Burns (I swear) and to the ultra sound room. I got to see my pancreas and my liver, y'all! I regretted asking Shelly if I had scerosis because we ended up laughing so hard that I started experiencing a 9. Anyway, back Shelly pushed me in my flying bed and I waited and waited and waited for the results. I illegally texted mrp and he came in and hung out with me and we made fun of the hospital and speculated about our homeless waiting room buddies. It was almost fun in a surreal and pathetic me kind of way. I felt bad for poor mrp wasting such a gorgeous day for wussy old me, but I was also so grateful because I think I would really have cried the whole time if I was there by myself. Anyway, after a long time finally Dawn came back and told me I am not with child and then came back with a paper that said I was seen by a doctor who I never met that said I had Pleurisy and to take 3 ibuprofens and rest more. The end.


Chelle said...

But what IS it??

I just remember the chick in Tennesse William's Glass Menagerie had it and she told her gentleman caller that she had Pleurosis and he thought she said Blue Roses. See, I WAS paying attention in 9th grade English.

Runnergirl said...

How long did your Pleurisy last? How long did it take before you could run again! How did you get through.....please advise

The Salty One said...

My pleurisy lasted for a long time, I'd say I had it for about 2 weeks before it got so bad I needed treatment and then another 8 weeks after that. I think I was running the day after I was in the ER. I took ibuprofen and actually iced it and that helped. It actually didn't hurt much when running, much more so when I wasn't. Running didn't seem to affect it or to be detrimental to my recovery at all. I sincerely believe it was stress related--I was under a tremendous amount of stress and had a lot of anxiety at the time it popped up. I have had other stress related inflammation problems before--scleritis which is swelling of the white of the eye, for instance! So, for me working on relaxing was the real trick. It was definitely no fun, though and very very scary!