Monday, March 05, 2007

Blogs Are for Not Shutting up about Running

To run the St Malachi race? That is the question. It feels nutty to run 3 races in 4 weeks. But, it's a fun race, it's hilly and I need practice racing hilly, and I would like to practice not going bonkers out of the gate in a race one more time before Boston. But the thought of racing just isn't getting me excited. I think part of it is my mild disappointment lingering from last week's half. I don't want another disappointment. That's silly talk, I know, but I can't help it. I suppose if I come to terms with my expectations and the performance I would have to give to not be disappointed it won't be so bad to race. Maybe I can settle for less than a pr? A pr would mean I'd have to run about 6:30 pace on all those hills and craggy road. Why am I fussing about these piddly hills when I'm running Boston in 6 weeks?! Ugh. Race anxiety. Seriously though, I think I can run 6:30's on those hills as long as I don't go out in 6:11 like I did in the last 5 miler I ran (oops!) Anyway, why does running take on this mythic importance in my life every now and then? I love it and all, but I have no pretense that I'm all that good at it. I'll never go beyond grabbing chili-bedecked trophies in the local races. That is the extent of the glory I can expect. But, I know I can run a little faster for those plastic and marble beauties and that knowledge seduces me into working harder and caring more than maybe I should? And Boston is in 6 weeks!!!! I suppose I don't have to decide right now. I can wait a couple of days and see if I get hipper to the idea of racing on Saturday.

Mrp said my blog is turning into a running blog. I suppose that's true. I need a forum to dump all the stuff about running so I don't talk about it more incessantly than I do. Plus, I'm happy now and I don't need to purge all my anxiety and stress like I did several months ago. THAT is a good thing.

Anyway, I'm working away on my amicus brief. It's going pretty well. I have the equivalent of my thesis hammered out and now I just have to fill out the argument from there. I wish I was a faster writer (and runner!). Luckily my writing is pretty polished so there usually isn't a horrendous amount of editing to be done. Yes, I see how silly it is that I'm complaining about being a slow writer while I write away on this time-wasting machine. So I will go now. Bye!

1 comment:

GP said...

Blogs are for not shutting up about running. And you shouldn't shut up about running because it's fun to read.

Thanks for the encouragement on my upcoming race. I need to get over this initial hill and hope that it's all downhill from there.

I really appreciate the good words and the good blog. It's also nice to have the reminder that being nervous doesn't necessarily forecast certain doom. Necessarily.