Thursday, September 20, 2007

Lightly Toasted

I'm wasted. My brain is toast. My body is beyond toast. After my workout last night I blubbered like a moron. I had an existential crisis. Why?

I don't even know how I finished the workout. I made it half-way through the reps and quit after the third one in a row was a couple seconds slow. I felt like I was running to my capacity and each time I was sure we'd hit the mile at 6:30 or even faster and here I was finishing the rep slower than 6:40!

Mrp ran it with me and when I gave up he demanded my watch and asked if I trusted him and then led me off the bridle path onto the paved path and we headed off. I was like a zombie running. My brain was just scrambled eggs sloshing around in my head and my body was numb. Time passed strangely. It went fast. It went slow. The only thing that saved me was mrp running ahead of me which allowed me to focus on catching him rather than focusing on how much I didn't give a sh*t about running the workout anymore. After my strides and the remainder of my cool down in the dark I made it back to the car and cried. Not about anything in particular, but because I was so beyond wasted my emotions were all wonky.

Mrp did deliver some good news. After I "quit" the workout I managed to run the last three miles right about on pace and each one getting progressively faster. So, I suppose in the marathon after I want to quit I can then dig deep and run a little faster maybe? I would be all cynical here and say, "or perhaps actually do the smart thing and really quit this time" but that is so negative it's not just Eeyore, it's goth Eeyore and just plain stupid, counterproductive, and just not me. But I had the impulse.

Thanks to everyone for the awesome advice and support regarding yesterday's post about my marathon goal, which coincidentally is the perfect segway back into Sunny McOutlooksville. I really believe that it is possible for me to run a 2:59 and not in the anything's possible! sense, but in the realistic sense. I would not however go so far as to say it's likely. I think 2:59 lies way at the upper end of my spectrum--if everything goes just right, bingo! If not, I do believe I'll hang in there for a substantial pr and that's ok with me.

Like JPW, I believe micro-managing pacing will lead to a bad result. But, as QS suggested, I do think the best races happen when you start conservatively and then listen to the old bod to figure out what it's capable of on that particular day under those particular circumstances. And you have to be patient. If I do go sub-3 I have always believed it would be just barely and would be a negative split. So, I think that if everything goes according to plan, something similar to QS's scenario will play out naturally.

I can't even believe I'm talking like this when I could barely run a 6:40 mile last night!

5 comments:

Lloyd said...

You're training great now. Trust it. There's still lots of time until race day. Find solace in that your preparation is better than ever. Knowing this is an asset to help you to relax.

I look forward to following along your progress to C-bus.

Joseph P. Wood said...

Salty,

Hang in there. You've got the work under you; now it's time to believe in the work, even if this week's been a little tough. You WILL run a good marathon...

Quinto Sol said...

You have been working your butt off (no pun intended); naturally, you are feeling tired. Not to mention that you have the stress of planning your wedding...

The taper will make the 'thon feel as if it were an easy run.

And the wedding will be the icing on the cake.

Jim said...

I have no doubts that you'll run a substantial PR. How exciting! Just do what you can do and if you really pop and do a sub-3 hour, that'll just be huge. But it'll still be nice to shatter your PR even if you don't get sub-3.

E-Speed said...

I think you are definitely ready for sub 3 and Columbus is a great course to do it on. Just trust in all your training and listen to your body on race day!