But in talking with mrp I realized that this independence was really just that I made enough money that I could hide my non-optimal money management skills (to be kind). It's not quitting my job and becoming a SAHM that is forcing me to change. It's being a mom and a partner that requires me to change and become more financially accountable. It also doesn't necessarily mean that I need to spend even less than I already do. It means I need to be open and honest with myself about money and in turn open and honest with mrp about it and quit being all weirdly emotional about it and worrying that I'm a bad person for not being able to meet a draconian budget.
I don't even know if this will make sense to anyone else, but this is a huge revelation for me. I am excited to remove the emotions out of money management and learn how to be a responsible member of a partnership. Can anyone recommend any good books on money management, particularly written for women?