Tuesday, May 25, 2010

Mo' Money

Y'all are going to think I'm crazy! I was just talking to mrp about the dreaded money topic and I completely had a revelation. All this time I was feeling so cornered by the situation of being a stay-at-home mom bringing in no income. I so longed for the days of my financial "independence."

But in talking with mrp I realized that this independence was really just that I made enough money that I could hide my non-optimal money management skills (to be kind). It's not quitting my job and becoming a SAHM that is forcing me to change. It's being a mom and a partner that requires me to change and become more financially accountable. It also doesn't necessarily mean that I need to spend even less than I already do. It means I need to be open and honest with myself about money and in turn open and honest with mrp about it and quit being all weirdly emotional about it and worrying that I'm a bad person for not being able to meet a draconian budget.

I don't even know if this will make sense to anyone else, but this is a huge revelation for me. I am excited to remove the emotions out of money management and learn how to be a responsible member of a partnership. Can anyone recommend any good books on money management, particularly written for women?

7 comments:

Catching up with Jessica said...

Wow, I'm going through that same thing right now. I try not to think about money ALL THE TIME. I'll be on the look out for a good book for us!

Anonymous said...

Hi Salty,

Have been reading your blog and following your adventures in motherhood and running! I have a 16 month daughter so it's nice to see what to expect since your peanut is a few months older. Anyway, I have a pdf copy of Suze Orman's "Women & Money" and would be happy to pass it along to you. Let me know what your email address is and I can send it to you if you're interested.

Grace

Carmen said...

I'm a huge fan of Suze Orman (both the show and the book). She has wrote a book specifically for women and money.

The Salty One said...

Grace--my email is thesalty one at gmail. THANKS!!!

chelle said...

I'm dreading having to be dependent on Jack soon. Especially since he's still unemployed, I don't even know how that's going to work! I actually always have been very responsible with money and instinctively frugal, but every time I think about not having my OWN money to be responsible for, I get totally stressed out. And of course as a SAHM you ARE working, there's just no way to account for that work's worth.

Mnowac said...

Laura - will you email me that document Grace sent you? I'd be interested. Anyway, I also think you really need to take into account how much money it COSTS to work outside of the home. 3/4 of one of my paychecks is going to Harper's daycare, and that's for one child. Plus I spent a few hundred on clothes and am in dire need of a few more pairs of work shoes. Plus I have been spending about $50 extra on food a week b/c I keep going to stinking whole foods on my lunch break for lunch and desk snacks. Plus the gas. I bet I am only bringing home 1 paycheck a month in reality.

kyle the girl said...

A long time ago you told me about a book called "Smart Couples Finish Rich" by David Bach. I read the counterpart for women "Smart Women Finish Rich" and it was really helpful for me. I might still have a copy laying around... I've also heard good things about Suze Orman's "Women and Money" but haven't checked it out.